01 - I Accidentally The Entire Album
Music: Composed by Alchav
Lyrics: darkNES
(darkNES:) Nip Slips, Leather Whips, SOGGY POTATO CHIPS!
02 - Don’t Tell Mom
Music: Composed by Alchav
Lyrics: Alchav
Don`t tell mom
Please, don`t tell mom
C`mon, don`t tell her
Don`t tell mom!
(That I)
Made a sandcastle in the sink
Colored on the wall with purple ink
Made an ant farm in my dresser drawer
Spilled plutonium on the kitchen floor
Sat on our gerbil until it was flat
Got into the ice cream and kicked the cat
Fed our dog Mentos and Diet Coke
C`mon, you know that it was just a joke,
So don`t tell mom
Please don`t tell mom
C`mon, don`t tell her
Don`t tell mom!
No, don`t tell mom
Please don`t tell mom
C`mon, don`t tell her
Don`t tell mom!
(That I got a)
Bunch of blood on her favorite shirt
And filled the coffee machine with dirt
Stayed up past midnight playing tetris
Watched the tapes under our roommate`s mattress
Stole candy bars and stuffed my pockets
Killed a hobo and flushed dad`s wallet
Sent a bomb threat to a public school
And tried to drown a kid in a public pool
Don`t tell mom
Please don`t tell mom
C`mon, don`t tell her
Don`t tell mom!
No, don`t tell mom
Please don`t tell mom
C`mon, don`t tell her
Don`t tell mom!
03 - Chicken Fingers
Music: Composed by Alchav
Lyrics: Alchav
I’m gonna have some Chicken Fingers
After I get them out of the oven-
AAHHHH MY FINGER! AH AH AAHHHH!
04 - Caturday
Music: Loops arranged by Alchav
Lyrics: Alchav
I saw a pill lying on the ground
But I thought it was a skittle so I munched it down
Then I scratched my head and went on my way
But strange things started to happen that day
I was soon confronted by a gelatinous blob
And a pizza that told me to get a job
Then floating around me were some feline heads
And they had a message for me to spread
Every day is Caturday
Every day is Caturday
Every day is Caturday
Every day is Caturday
Every day is Caturday
Every day is Caturday
Every day is Caturday
Every day is Caturday
I soon woke up from what I guess was a dream
And I headed to the kitchen to get some ice cream
But my freezer started complaining about pensions
When I accidentally stepped into an alternate dimension
Where a gravekeeper offered me a deep-fried weiner
In the cemetery for vaccuum cleaners
Then those cats were everywhere, it was getting absurd
And they asked me why I hadn’t spread the word
Every day is Caturday
Every day is Caturday
Every day is Caturday
Every day is Caturday
Every day is Caturday
Every day is Caturday
Every day is Caturday
Every day is Caturday
EVERY DAY IS CATURDAY!
EVERY DAY IS CATURDAY!
EVERY DAY IS CATURDAY!
6 months later they let me free
From the loonie bin, and I grabbed my keys
And hopped in my car and took off fast
Knowing I’m past my cat episodes at last
Unwinding at home, hopped on my machine
Started looking at funny pictures on my screen
Then my skin turned pale and I wanted to scream
When I saw the phrase that haunts my dreams
Every day is Caturday
Every day is Caturday
Every day is Caturday
Every day is Caturday
Every day is Caturday (Here kitty kitty kitty)
Every day is Caturday (kitty kitty kitty kitty)
Every day is Caturday (Here kitty kitty kitty)
Every day is Caturday (kitty kitty kitty kitty)
EVERY DAY IS CATURDAY!
EVERY DAY IS CATURDAY!
EVERY DAY IS CATURDAY!
etc.
05 - Halo
Music: Composed by Alchav
Lyrics: Alchav, the internets
I think Halo is a pretty cool guy.
I think Halo is a pretty cool guy.
I think Halo is a pretty cool guy.
I think Halo is a pretty cool guy.
eh kills aleins and doesnt afraid
eh doesnt afraid of anything
eh kills aleins, eh kills aleins
and doesnt afraid of anything
06 - The Anti-Wheat
Music: Composed by Alchav
Lyrics: Alchav; inspired by ShoEboX
I AM THE ANTI-WHEAT
YOU ARE THE ANTI-WHEAT
I AM THE ANTI-WHEAT
ALL BREAD MUST BE DESTROYED
YOU ARE THE ANTI-WHEAT
ALL OUR WHEAT MUST BE SAVED
I AM THE ANTI-WHEAT
ALL FLOUR MUST BE DESTROYED
YOU ARE THE ANTI-WHEAT
ANTI-WHEAT MUST BE DESTROYED
Cookies
Pizza
Crackers
Donuts
Croutons
Pie
Croissants
Doritos…MUST BE DESTROYED
YOU ARE THE ANTI-WHEAT
ANTI-WHEAT WILL BE DESTROYED
I AM THE ANTI-WHEAT
WHEAT-EATERS WILL BE DESTROYED
WE USE WHEAT ON THE ANTI-WHEAT
ANTI-WHEAT HAS BEEN DESTROYED
I AM THE ANTI-WHEAT
ANTI-WHEAT WILL BE BACK
07 - No Reason
Music: Composed by Alchav
Lyrics: Alchav
I’m being loud (being loud)
I’m being loud for no reason
I’m being loud (being loud)
I’m being loud for no reason
I’m being loud (being loud)
I’m being loud for no reason
I’m being loud (being loud)
I’m being loud for no reason
08 - Things That Are Easily Broken
Music: Loops arranged by Alchav
Lyrics: Alchav
Windows
Lamps
Hearts
Dishes
Laws
Vinyl Records
Dreams
Laptops
Preoccupations
English
Glasses
Women’s feelings
09 - Office Life (Mondays Remix)
Music: Loops arranged by Alchav
Lyrics: Alchav
Paperclip!
10 - Nintendo
Music: Composed by Alchav
Lyrics: Alchav
I think Nintendo is a pretty cool guy
I think Nintendo is a pretty cool guy
I think Nintendo is a pretty cool guy
I think Nintendo is a pretty cool guy
Eh eats mushrooms and doesn’t afraid
Eh doesn’t afraid of anything
Eh eats mushrooms, eh eats mushrooms
And doesn’t afraid of anything!
11 - Old People Suck
Music: Loops arranged by Alchav
Lyrics: Alchav
Old people suck
They`re just a waste of space
I really can`t stand `em
They need to be replaced
They always stay alive
Week after week
To whine about insurance
And pinch you on the cheek
Many don`t have teeth
So all they eat is mush
We`ll cut them into pieces
Then down the toilet we`ll flush
Old people suck
They`re wasting all our taxes
It`s time to round them up
And grind `em down with axes
They can never hear you
Unless you speak up
So they`ll never hear us coming
If we simply sneak up
Let`s go hunt some seniors
If you need a gun, well here`s a free one
Old people suck
So I hope I don`t grow up to be one
12 - Probably
Music: Composed by Alchav
Lyrics: Alchav
We’re probably all gonna die
We’re probably all gonna die
Really soon
13 - A Lesson In Love
Music: Composed by Alchav
14 - Portal
Music: Composed by Alchav
Lyrics: Alchav
I think Portal is a pretty cool guy
I think Portal is a pretty cool guy
I think Portal is a pretty cool guy
I think Portal is a pretty cool guy
Eh lies about cake and doesn’t afraid
Eh doesn’t afraid of anything
Eh lies about cake, eh lies about cake
And doesn’t afraid of anything!
15 - Hey Birthday Boy
Music: Composed by Alchav
Lyrics: Spaff
We celebrate your birthday
Even if you don’t
Be glad you’re getting older
‘Cause when you’re dead you won’t
So happy happy birthday
From everyone you know
Now we light the candles
And birthday boy you BLOW!!!
16 - Why Having Kids Is Fun
Music: Loops arranged by Alchav
Lyrics: Alchav
Mom! (repeated improvisionally)
17 - Pro-Choice
Music: Composed by Alchav
Lyrics: Alchav
I think Pro-Choice is a pretty cool guy
I think Pro-Choice is a pretty cool guy
I think Pro-Choice is a pretty cool guy
I think Pro-Choice is a pretty cool guy
Eh kills babies and doesn’t afraid
Eh doesn’t afraid of anything
Eh kills babies, eh kills babies
And doesn’t afraid of anything!
18 - Old People Suck (Decrepit Version)
Alternate version of track 11
19 - The Other Side of the Pillow (Noise Version)
Remix of the song from “Extra Cheese”
20 - New Coke
Remake of the song “Coke” from In Stereo. Get it?
21 - I Don’t Wanna Die (Adventure of Link mix by Positive Attitude)
Remix of the song from Extra Cheese; remixed by C-Minus of Positive Attitude
22 - Don’t Tell Mom (Grounded For Life mix by Caustic)
Remix of track 2; remixed very awesomely by the super awesome Matt Fanale aka Sega Lugosi aka Eurotic aka Not Eurotic aka Caustic.
23 - Morning Angst (Contractual Obligation mix by Derwood Bowen)
Remix of the song from In Stereo; remixed by Derwood Bowen
24 - Is This Dangerous?
Music: Composed by Alchav